#BookReview: CHAOS: In Romance, Sexuality and Fidelity definitely stands out!

You all know my love for books. The book nerd in me had a perfect start of the decade with being a part of the World Book Fair 2020 here in New Delhi from where I grabbed more books than my entire family could carry for me😊. A book is larger than life for me and so far I had kept my experiences with them mostly to myself but now I intend to write my reviews on the chosen few which I feel you must know about and may love to pick. 

So today I am writing on of the recent non-fiction I have been reading. It is

CHAOS: In Romance, Sexuality, and Fidelity 

by Raksha Bharadia 

Honestly, while picking it up I was in two minds as I didn’t know what to expect from it. Its snippets on the web had caught my attention and I am elated that I did choose it because this indeed turned out to be a very well researched book so full of facts which both amuse you as well as make you ponder. Subtle truth you never knew but are worth knowing straight from the experts.

Synopsis of the book

A close look at love, marriage, sex, individuality and infidelity. Most urban couples today experience some amount of chaos in their interpersonal relationships—whether it be in the struggle to remain sexually exclusive, in keeping the erotic spark alive, trying to balance between the need for intimacy and personal space or in handling the new age demon called boredom!

Long-established patterns of married life are breaking down in a new India where gender equality and individualism have blurred the domestic division of labour and leadership, often resulting in ego clashes between partners.. Technological advancements such as birth control, IVF, paternity tests etc., open up options but bring along accompanying complications. It is the same with the Internet and social media. Old rules of couple relationship--both explicit and implicit--do not fit well anymore; new rules are still not in place.

In such a scenario, this book seeks to understand the little equations that go to make up a long-term relationship, thereby throwing light on the steps that, if not well managed, lead to chaos for both partners.

Some of the questions addressed here are: Why do we feel the need to guard our partner’s sexuality? Why does boredom set in, in most long-term relationships? Why do affairs begin and is it really about sex or love at all? And many more such, that deal with the nitty-gritty of day-to-day sharing of the physical, emotional and sexual space between couples.

By the end of this book, you may just revisit all that you have been taking for granted!

My Take on the Book 

Chaos basically talks about the chaos in the romantic and sexual life of a couple as some years pass by. How the desire vanes as does the surprise element out of too much familiarity. The case studies and real-life instances mentioned there so relatable. It also gives practical solutions to reduce the mental clutter in matters pertaining to the heart to a fair extent. 

Some things I really loved about the book is that it talks about women’s suppressed sexual desires quite vocally and many other taboo subjects without an iota of judgment. A peek into the contradictory history of the same was intriguing and I felt enriched. 

I stopped at relevant intervals and discussed some points with my man too and that made the reading quite interesting for me. There were some points I didn’t agree to though but each one of us is allowed to have his or her opinion right or maybe I found the facts too hard to digest😉. Anyways most of the time, I was nodding my head in agreement or was wide-eyed to learn something new and really interesting. The book also refutes the societal laws brutally. 

Full marks to the author for steering clear of any biases in the book whatsoever. She has expressed the pure human emotions without glorifying or demonizing a particular choice. 

All in all, I found this book really different, thought-provoking and helpful too. It definitely is worth a read and is a different experience altogether. This is my second book after Paulo Coelho’s Hippie this year and I am absolutely delighted to give this one a read. 

My Rating of the book 

🌟🌟🌟🌟

Grab a copy here

Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/CHAOS-101613734634246/?modal=admin_todo_tour

Amazon https://amzn.to/2oPNXvh

Flipkart https://bit.ly/2VahDPZ

Snapdeal https://bit.ly/2LLY5hG 

The kindle link here: https://amzn.to/31ztXuq

Thank you so much, Raksha for sending over a copy for an earnest review.

If you like what I write, you can grab the copies of my four published ebooks here: The Fragrance of True Love, Destiny's Favorite Child, Dare to Defy The Destiny and Empowered Women Empower Women

#MovieReview : #Panga beautifully inspires every mom to make her comeback

My starting statement for the review of this movie shall be every mom, every dad and every kid of today’s generation must watch this flick for the wonderful message it spreads. It is undoubtedly the warmest and meaningful movie I had seen in recent times and have to write about it to all of you. How I wish more and more movies on this subject were made and the message was sent deeper and deeper. Yes, 

‘No dreams must ever be crushed or sacrificed on the name of motherhood’

and I am not saying this for the heck of saying this but because I stand for this cause too. Have been there, know the pain and the feeling of seeing your intellect and experience rot over time and frustrate you. Why not rather do what gives you the greatest joy and the rest will all fall in place.

Since this movie is on women empowerment and then on sports both I and the spouse were keen to watch it at the earliest and I am so glad I did. I first came to know about it from #TheKapilSharmaShow and was immediately intrigued by the caste and the director and I have to say Ashwiny Iyer Tiwari has done a beautiful job with Jaya Nigam played by Kangana Ranaut, her husband Prashant player by Jassie Gill, her son Aadi played by Yagna Bhasin, her mom played by Neena Gupta and her best friend played By Richa Chadha.

The story is about Jaya who was on top of her game as the captain of the Indian Kabaddi Team when she embraced maternity and as her son had immunity issues she had to abandon her sport and do a ticket collector job in Railways. When her son turns seven and randomly misbehaves with his mom his dad intervenes and tells him about what she was. The son then plays a catalyst for Jaya to reclaim her way to the glory which in no way was an easy job both on the personal and professional front. 

But her husband’s unparalleled support makes her embrace the goal which once seemed impossible. The world indeed needs many many more supportive and understanding husbands like Prashant who listens, understands and then accepts her wife’s desire. He is an epitome of true love in the film. 

Why haven’t we ever heard of a dad sacrificing his career for the kids, is a question which lingers in my brain forever, why it always has to be the mom? 

If you have an answer do illuminate my knowledge. 

I so love the adorable family shown in the film. Yagna is impeccable as the kid. I could relate to each scene and I am sure many of you will find striking resemblances from your life in it like I did. The strength of the movie is this nitty-gritty and moments of love and friendly nagging of Jaya with her partner, with her mom and with her friends. I can describe them here but I would love you to watch and smile at them and not play a spoilsport.

The story, in general, doesn’t have negative characters barring the new Indian captain and the movie is about the protagonist taking panga with life and her dreams at an age of thirty-two when her co-players ask her to say buddhi in place of kabaddi and this undoubtedly is one of Kangana’s Best Performances yet again. She has actually owned the character and the film. Every single artist of the movie has done their job to perfection be it, Neena Gupta, as relatable mom or Richa as her kabaddi bestie. My only complaint if I had to pick one is the climax of the movie, as an audience, I was left wanting to see the ace player Jaya to show some extraordinary play before she emerged the champion again. Those scenes needed a keen and tight weave to have our hearts in our mouth as we had waited for them in the whole movie. The fact that the selectors pick Jaya in the national squad again to gain media attention as the comeback of a mom, depicts the shallowness of the thoughts of our society. 

You will find many such messages hidden in the film here and there aptly and above all I really hold this movie high because it inspires each mom who has abandoned a flourishing career to make the comeback and reclaim her lost glory or even start afresh if she hasn’t yet. This is the reason I say every mom must take a similar panga in life. We must give this one chance to ourselves and carve our own identity and that shall be our real tribute to motherhood, not our sacrifice.

I rate PANGA 🌟🌟🌟🌟 and term it a must-watch for all 😊

5 Unique Ways to celebrate Valentine’s Day

Undoubtedly with Valentine’s Day approaching, love is in the air and I totally believe we must grab as many chances as possible,  to celebrate love in our lives and I insist with all our loved ones. Honestly, Valentine’s Day is a festival in our home and has always been extra special for us no matter how the world chooses to judge it. I celebrate it with the love of my life cum my husband cum my bestie of over two decades (all of them are the same guy) and my little waala valentine, my sonny boy, making time for both individually as well together for all three of us..trying to make it unique in my own small way each year and today am sharing with you some cool ideas hoping they spice up your celebrations of love too without drilling a hole in your pocket with expensive gifts.

1. Heart theme deco and letters

Buy some pretty flowers like jasmine or any other flower of your choice and make heart-shaped flower rangolis with them in chosen nooks and corners of your home(remember not to overdo them, they must express your pure love). This little surprise will light up the day of your love and bring the most cherished smile on his face. Also cut colored paper sheets in heart shape and leave out of the box love notes or doodles, with a touch of humor or romance or simply tender love, in them,  hidden at unexpected places like the pocket of his trouser or the pencil case of your kid.

2. Scented candlelight date at midnight

Do up a very special place in your home (an attic or study where you won’t be disturbed) with some exotic scented candles and some wine or whatever you both love and a tiny cake. Hint your partner to meet you at 12 all dressed up. Slip into his favorite dress and spend some wonderful we time amidst the romantic candlelight and mesmerizing perfumes at the stroke of midnight. Trust me these precious moments will truly ignite the passion which the moms and dads in us miss. Use the same table to enjoy a special lunch with your kid in the afternoon after he or she is back from school and express your love with their favorite food for the cute little angels of our life. 

3. Bake your heart in heart-shaped cupcakes

If you enjoy baking, try making some yum cupcakes with heart-shaped icing in multiple hues and put in hubby’s and kid’s lunch boxes as a surprise. You can also get it baked from a home baker nearby. Another idea could be writing some adorable messages on the cupcakes itself. I once wrote a valentine poem for my man on the heart-shaped cake on this day a few years back and it read and tasted so delicious 😊. 

4. A cozy and secluded movie date

When you are thinking of unique gifting options thorough research often helps. In my quest for the same, I landed on a super rocking movie date venue known as Director’s Cut. It was pricey at weekends but the weekdays and the morning shows were pocket friendly options that too with the least crowd. I did an advance booking much earlier and it turned out to be a worthwhile experience. Cozily enjoying the movie in the blanket with your love and the best dark chocolate on earth was truly an enchanting experience. Something on these lines can always be worked out.

5. A trip to the mountains or a lush green place

I and my husband met in Pantnagar and our love bloomed in Nainital. We have a memory associated with almost every place there. Thus given a chance on special days like this, we love to drive to the mountains there and live each moment again with a smile. The face of our love, our little sunshine enjoys the trip too as we narrate to him tiny anecdotes from mom dad’s life. The idea is you don’t need an exotic dinner date or a expensive gift to celebrate this special day just go to a serene place nearby you love and hold each other’s hand. Talk, smile, share leaving behind all worries. No matter how cliched this sounds, every human being needs that touch, those priceless smiles and an occasional expression of true love seen in the eyes of our partner. Don’t you agree? Watching a sunrise or a sunset together marveling at Mother Nature and professing your love will be as eternal as them comes as the most soothing reminder to your better half. 

Well, In my opinion, we must celebrate love each day and thus every day is Valentine’s Day. You may use any of the above ideas to beat monotonous everyday life any day why wait for 14th February. These are some of the ways in which the diehard romantic in me keeps the flame burning, I hope you find them worthy. Do write to me if you could use any of these in your celebrations and will love to feature you 😊.

If you like what I write, you can grab the copies of my four published ebooks here: The Fragrance of True Love, Destiny's Favorite Child, Dare to Defy The Destiny and Empowered Women Empower Women

Salt Therapy Benefits for kids and Adults Health

My biggest fear when we came to know that we have to shift to Delhi was Delhi’s mammoth pollution. Thus, despite the opportunity being really worthy I tried to resist it as much as I could for I knew the ill effects of hazardous AQI on our respiratory health particularly. 

Nevertheless, we did shift and that too in peak pollution and winter months. I took crazy precautions and was mostly indoors with air purifiers yet had cough, cold and fever repeatedly for the first two months. Luckily I learned about an alternate therapy which can be extremely useful in giving us a respite from most of the simple and chronic respiratory disorders without any side effects and can work wonders even for our skin and aid us destress and even relieve our fatigue and anxiety.

 This therapy is known as Salt Therapy of Halotherapy and in this article, I intend to create awareness about this simple technique so that all of us can reap its advantage. I wonder why it has been an underdog so far because most of my friends and acquaintances who expressed a deep desire to know about this after reading about my experience on Instagram, admitted they had no idea about it. 

Well, Salt Therapy is an age-old therapy founded accidentally by a practicing doctor in Poland in 1843 where workers in underground salt mines suffered fewer respiratory sicknesses.

By chiseling and grinding the salt, the miners produced micro-sized particles of salt that were dispersed into the air of the mine and then inhaled which healed them. 

What is salt therapy? 

Salt therapy also known as halotherapy is a holistic, drug-free, non-invasive, natural therapy for relieving symptoms caused by congestion, inflammation, and allergies of respiratory system and skin. In halotherapy, micronized dry salt is inhaled in a chamber that mimics a salt cave environment. It promotes better breathing, healthier skin, sounder sleep, improved physical fitness, and endurance and wellness. 

Why is it beneficial?

The benefits stem from the fact that salt is antibacterial, antiinflammatory, it loosens excessive mucus and speeds up mucociliary transport, it removes pathogen agents (airborne pollen) and Reduces IgE level (immune system oversensitivity). 

Where is it given? 

Salt therapy is usually given in salt caves, salt rooms( for lungs) or salt beds (for better exposure of skin) which have relaxing massage chairs for adults and play rooms for kids. You can choose to do your favorite relaxing activity too inside. 

There the salt is grounded into tiny microparticles by special devices knows as halogenerators and then dispersed into the salt rooms or beds. While relaxing in one of these, we deep breath and inhale the salt-enriched air deep down into the lungs, for unparalleled healing benefits. 

The science behind Halo Therapy

The salt thus inhaled widens our airways and loosens the mucus, which begins to clear quickly, and inflammation is reduced, which makes more room in the airways for us to breathe and thus we start feeling better in just 15-25 minutes. Symptoms subside, sometimes for up to 12 months. The non-inhaled particles landing on the skin help to balance pH and induce the reparative and regenerative processes in the skin, increasing rigidity and stimulating our cell growth and microcirculation. Isn’t that super amazing and easy peasy? 

Suitable for which age group? 

This therapy is equally suitable for all age groups and has no side effects as the microparticles of common salt are getting in our respiratory system and not the digestive system. 

Whether it is babies, children or adults, salt therapy can help soothe a lot of skin, respiratory and lifestyle conditions for all. 

Why is it so important?

In today’s times of extreme pollution with our little ones often having repeated episodes of bitter cough and wheezing this therapy can prove vital and indispensable and saves us from resorting to antibiotics or steroids.

You will be amazed to know that salt therapy has proven benefits in the case of Asthma, COPD, Fibrosis, Sinus, Cold & Flu, Eczema, Psoriasis, Hay Fever, Stress, Anxiety, and Fatigue. However this does mean you skip your medication while taking it until the symptoms improve.

Salt therapy caves, spas and clinics are available now in many major cities in India and we can do it to a certain effective extent in our homes too. 

A Word of caution

Certain reports suggest inhaling large amount of salts can cause hypertension that is why the timings of this therapy are limited. It is advisable to get a health checkup done before taking this therapy.

How can we do Salt Therapy at home?  

For it we need to purchase an ultrasonic desalinizer or the salt machine which transforms the salt into minuscule particles, making them unobtrusive when breathing them in. The salt used in salt therapy should be natural rock salt to achieve the best results.

I first experienced a salt cave some years back in Europe and am so relieved finally to rediscover them in Delhi through Tata Salt team who are running an initiative around it. Its benefits are something I really wished all fo you to know and thus have tried to include all the basic information required about the same, in simplest terms here.

Disclaimer: The purpose of this post is to give you a brief idea about this therapy. Kindly consult your medical practitioner before taking it.

If you like what I write, you can grab the copies of my four published books here: The Fragrance of True Love, Destiny's Favorite Child, Dare to Defy The Destiny and Empowered Women Empower Women

Child’s nutrition & his mental health are connected: 5 Vital Tips #GrowRight

I have been meaning to write this for a long time. As a mother, the amount of pressure that the tiny kids face in today’s era, baffles me. Almost every parent intends to prepare his child to outperform not only in academics but in extracurricular activities too. But what we forget in this endeavour of ours is that amidst all this, our little precious ones are subjected to a lot of mental stress which in turn may make them lose their appetite and trigger mental health issues in them. Lack of proper nutrition due to this may further lead to issues like Attention Deficit Disorder and as the anxiety further builds on, one may get trapped in a vicious circle which is not a good sign. Thus, today I bring to you five key points on how to take care of a child's mental health in India.

1. Proper Nutrition plays a Pivotal Role in securing Good Mental Health of a child: It is important that our kid’s diet contains all the essential nutrients for appropriate brain development which controls our mental health. This becomes significant as most of the brain development takes place in the early years of a child’s life. Proteins, vitamins and minerals, fibers, carbs and fats all are essential for our children but how to ensure they get it all can be the biggest worry. One sure shot way of ensuring my kid receives all 37 vital nutrients needed for his sound mental as well physical growth is giving him PediaSure once a day as recommended by my paediatrician. This makes me rest assured I have not missed on anything as the little one often gets back the lunch box untouched.
   

2. Make your home a de-stressing zone for the kid: Making our home a happy place for our little peanuts can really work wonders. Greet them with smiles and hugs when they come back from school. Talk to them about what the best part of the day at school was when they eat and drink. Describing to you happily what happened will de-stress and aid release of happy hormones in them.

3. Inculcate love for music and fine arts: Listen to music, dance together or get into art and craft with your kiddo for an hour at least each day. These aid the toddlers and elder kids to relax and rejuvenate and are very good for their mental health. Combine fruit time here, woven in as a game. We often try our hands at new things and baking and enjoying the rich PediaSure almond cookies is a current favourite pass-time. 

At no time forget that proper nutrition and sound mental health have a huge connection so weaving them together intelligently works.

4. Valuable free play: A child needs minimum three hours** of play every day. Please make sure your kid gets free play time everyday even in exams. It is crucial for his independence and time management skills too. Let them enjoy their childhood and innocence and apply their brains to utilise their free play time their way. It is vital to their mental peace.

5. Amalgamate Breaks and surprises: Stress builds in kids in routine monotonous lengthy school hours coupled with loads of homework back home. So in our home we plan an optimal number of weekend breaks and surprise travels with the kid to farms etc. where the kid can enjoy fresh vegetables and fruits along with learning and enjoying and yes de-stressing too. In travel again, my perennial companion is PediaSure which ensures all is well on the kid’s nutrient intake front. The Grow Right Charter from PediaSure is a great guide in ensuring all these measures work together to let my kiddo grow in a healthy, safe environment.

**Grow Right Charter of PediaSure

If you like what I write, you can grab the copies of my four published books here: The Fragrance of True Love, Destiny's Favorite Child, Dare to Defy The Destiny and Empowered Women Empower Women

Commencing New Year in Style with a heart full of Gratitude

Happiest New Year Everyone! Really wanted to drop here earlier as it feels incomplete without wishing you all, an essential part of my life. Anyways better late than never 😊. So how are you all doing? Spent the new year night cozily in the blanket or partied hard to ring in the new decade? Well, this time we were in Delhi almost after a decade and decided to ring it the way we used to do in our pre-wedding days by dancing and partying to the new year tunes. The venue we chose was the Grand Ball Room in Radisson Blu Dwarka as it allowed our kid to party with us and enjoy the evening. It was a gala night with the Russian dancers keeping us company throughout and some amazing food and drinks. We danced well past the midnight as we were putting up in the same property and carved some precious memories. Though the crowd and the mismanagement by the staff baffled us, but let’s keep that review for some other day not in my first post of the year.  

2nd January again marked some celebrations on account of mister husband’s birthday and we were very keen on making it extra special this year. Glad we could do our bit for the silent man of the house who only believes in giving to others. Thus had a fun packed New Year and his birthday bash.

As if that was not enough, yesterday we decided to soak in some sun and continue our coveted heritage walk to Qutub Minar. The idea of having our kid with us too this time excited us even more. Most of the time we hit these places during our morning walks when he is in school. It was a perfect Sunday afternoon though we sincerely advice you to book your tickets online before going there on a weekend. We soaked in the sun as well as enjoyed our leisurely stroll at the picturesque site along with clicking loads of pictures. Playing hide and seek and running behind the squirrels was our most favourite part of the day. You all already know how I thrive on these little joys of life.

Came back terribly exhausted yesterday but was keen on writing to you all. I had picked up my favourite dairy and pen to jot the same when a ping from a dear friend made my day. My blog had yet again made to the Top 250 Indian Blogs and there couldn’t have been a better New Year Gift honestly. My heart is so overwhelmed with gratitude, there undoubtedly wasn’t a better way to commence the new decade in style, for a writer like me. It is so motivating.

Last few months I had been missing my academy in Pune, I didn’t realise my how my students there have become such a vital part of my life. Though I am connected with almost all of them and am still taking online sessions a personal connect of meeting in person is missed so badly and had made me feel empty at times. I miss my friends there, my yoga sessions, my yoga sessions and it is still a while to forge new lifelong friendships here in Delhi. 

But things have begun to look good. I have lot of beautiful decade old memories of this place which are worth reliving. Also, there are lots of colleagues and friends to be dug out and met again. So actually while there is no specific New Year Resolution and Goals, after stressful extreme pollution and extremely cold winter, my aim this year is to build our new abode here and feel more settled. I also intend to write exhaustively on women's health and create as much awareness as I can for I feel women's health is a crucial often ignored dimension of women empowerment in our country.

Another strong feeling which is doing rounds to my brain repeatedly is a premonition of something big that’s going to happen this year. I have no clue what exactly it is but whenever I have had such intuition in the past it has always turned true. I am both amused and excited to know if there is something new really destined for me this year but all I can do is wait and watch. Do you have such premonitions too?

Well, I end this page of my online diary here today and will write back to you soon 😊. 

If you like what I write, you can grab the copies of my four published books here: The Fragrance of True Love, Destiny's Favorite Child, Dare to Defy The Destiny and Empowered Women Empower Women