A Tribute to an Endometriosis Warrior on a Mission

This is Endometriosis Awareness Month and how can I not write around it when the most traumatic fact about this condition is that on average it takes 11 years to diagnose this disease and till then our lives are arguably crippled to even do certain basic tasks of a day without even knowing what is causing it. I had been made to believe by certain very renowned doctors that the excruciating pain that I experienced due to endometriosis was a psychological illness for over a decade. But I had a firm head and failed to fall prey to their misdiagnosis and inability to detect that I had endometriosis until the disease aggravated to its 4th stage. 

Thereafter too, the debates never ended. Whether should I take the hormonal pills and injections that ease my pain and stop my menstrual cycles but on the other hand had severe side effects? When they too stopped working, I was advised, to go under the knife, then began the next debate between my Pune gynecologist and the surgeon, whether or not to remove my uterus, though both of them were genuinely good and had their reasons? While my gynecologist wanted to save me from the trauma I was facing due to my condition, the surgeon thought I was too young for such a critical organ removal. All this while I only felt like a guinea pig as till then all I knew was that endometriosis does not have any treatment that can ensure it will go away permanently.

The surgery was done in 2019, and the disease returned to the same extent in exactly seven months. I was heartbroken and kind of tired and my threshold to bear the pain had gone down drastically, mentally I felt very vulnerable though still adamant about not giving up. Destiny wanted to try me harder and one morn while working out in the gym I started bleeding profusely for days and weeks at a stretch. Delhi gynecologists were harsher they broke my confidence further by offering me different packages to remove multiple organs this time without any guarantee that the pain, my most disturbing symptom along with bleeding sometimes for as long as 45 days will go away. Then began the perennial debate about whether to go for it or not. This time it was me versus them and the strong-headed me decided to go against it. 

It was exactly ten months ago that I refused this surgery because I was still bearing the side effects of the previous one which has made me age by at least 10 years. It is right when wise men say that surgery must be our last resort. Thankfully my decision so far has turned in my favor. 

I have resorted to a lot of praying for tapping the power of my subconscious in my favor along with medication from an Ayurvedic endometriosis specialist. I am happy, I am healthy, I am healed is my prayer every day because prayers are perhaps the sanest way to keep you grounded and aware, and grateful. My chantings and my writings have given me a lot of peace and calmness. The void in me that the sickness created every time dragging me back in the fulfillment of my goals (I could not restart my academy that I ran successfully in Pune in Delhi) is slowly melting away for I have learned to manage my life-long medical condition and life together in the most balanced way.

Behind my smile, which I am ready to flash at the drop of a hat because I genuinely consider it my strongest weapon, I have now equipped myself with a lot more strength, and a lot more discretion and choice. I have become very choosy about the work I accept and invest my time selectively in what gives me pure joy. Unfortunately, I face social media aversion too these days but thankfully I still breathe and love writing every single day of my life. In January and February, I penned letters to my son which I gifted him on his birthday in March, and pouring out my heart in them taught me a lot, and softened me further as I looked book at my journey. Hopefully, I shall put them together in my 8th book if my child shall be fine with putting my work in public. 

From being a Gold medalist Automobile engineer and working in giants in Tata Motors, Ikea of Sweden, and Honda Cars to being a blogger and author of 7 published books for the last 14 years and running a communication skills academy in Pune, I am grateful I could do and am still doing exactly what I loved. There is nothing else I desire and by the grace of God am in the most peaceful stage in my life which I shall not give up at any cost. 

I really wanted to pen my endometriosis journey which I had done before too because typically in India we women take our health for granted and put ourselves in the last without realizing we have to be healthy first to keep others healthy. For 12 long years, I had kept popping Allopathic hormonal tablets to keep the undiagnosed pain at bay and have ruined my body, but I just don’t want it to happen to anyone else, I thus have penned a heartfelt series of several articles in the past many years on what actually is endometriosis, what are the early symptoms, what home remedies help, what yoga practices do wonders and that this otherwise untreatable considered disease has a fair treatment in Ayurveda. If even one woman can benefit from them I will consider my work done.

I also personally speak and guide as many women as possible on this and am on an unsaid mission to be an endo warrior and do my best to spread awareness on the same. If you find someone who has uncontrollable periods' pain and severe bleeding, do ask them to contact me I will try my best to give them the right leads, I have been doing it for some years now and to be just able to share their pain with someone who knows helps a great deal because primarily this silent disease which is also a form of benign cancer is not considered a disease because diagnosing it is very tricky. I am linking below all related blog posts I had penned on the subject with the most earnest desire that they reach the person in need through you.

Endometriosis has its treatment in Ayurveda

My Decade-long Endometriosis Battle 

5 Early Signs of Endometriosis 

5 Recommendations for Endometriosis Patients

10 Powerful Yoga Asanas for Endometriosis, Weight Loss, and Flat Stomach

I apologize that I picked myself to write about on International Women’s Day though I know several phenomenal women, exactly because of this mission I am on and this is my direction of life at work now. Let’s be the face of positive change in our society for the greater good of the women who either suffer silently or don't get the proper diagnosis and treatment of this disorder which every 1 in 10 women suffer with.

If you like what I write, you can grab copies of my seven published ebooks here: The Fragrance of True Love, Destiny's Favorite Child, Dare to Defy The Destiny, Empowered Women Empower Women, Soulful Letters On COVID for my Future Grandchild, I Live to Love You and Soft Strings Of My Heart or simply write to me for free review copies

This blog post is part of the Women's Day Blog Hop, themed on She: A Tribute to Her, hosted by Swarnali Nath.

The joy of tapping the power of your subconscious in your favour

I am healthy 

I am happy 

I am fearless 

I exude positivity 

This is a simple mantra I chant and manifest multiple times a day. I am sure many of you would have heard of and must also be practising affirmations and I too started doing it post my surgery in 2019. I repeated them multiple times because I have read about the power of our subconscious and manifestations, a debatable though scientifically proven topic for some and of immense faith for others. For me the question was different, I have a lot of faith in science so my question was what is the right way of training your subconscious and manifesting because the more I researched the more I understood as much as the belief matters the technique is equally important too. You may be manifesting the right thing in the wrong way and then get disappointed with the result, so we must choose our words wisely. Once I realised this I made amends. Try using all positive words in your manifestation and avoid any negative mentions. 

For those who haven’t tried it yet, let me enumerate how we manifest what we desire in our lives, trust me it is easier said than done. So if there is something you want desperately you have to assume it has already happened and keep thanking universe for making it happen. This way you are visualising it has already happened several times a day. There are specific ways of doing the manifestation too like the 3,6,9 rule which is known to be magical. Many people have even reversed their cancers using it vehemently. If you want me to write about it at length let me know in the comments and I will surely cover it. There too the technique of prayer and choice of words matter, I have experienced it personally.

Another important point is our conscious mind and subconscious must work in tandem for our manifestations to come true. Our conscious mind is the driver while the subconscious is the driven though the latter is more powerful but it doesn’t have a judgement of its own it will only help in manifesting what it’s conscious brain will feed him. Often we wish to tap the power of our subconscious to keep us healthy but in our conscious brain we keep fearing we will fall sick again. So the subconscious will manifest what we are fearing and will make us sick again because we are what our thoughts are. Thus we must ensure we are always consciously talking and most importantly thinking positive because our subconscious is hearing and it can’t differentiate between true and false, it will manifest that is fed to it.

Thus if I say 

I am happy

I am healthy 

I am fearless 

I exude positivity 

Loudly or softly many times a day it won’t happen until I will firmly believe in it because only if I, my conscious mind, will believe the subconscious will too. So it is also a matter of faith.

It is like praying to your favourite deity like I say Sai is my father he always takes care of me in thick and thin and has never abandoned me and this faith of mine is unshakable. Thus every time I call out to Sai my problems no matter how adverse they get are eventually resolved because my faith has given positive vibrations to the entire universe which has put at work it’s infinite energies in my favour.

Tapping in the power of your sub conscious is not easy but once you can, it is absolutely blissful, it gives you a lot of calm and better power to deal with situations because you have a strong faith that things will eventually turn in your favour. It makes life worthy and empowers us.

If you are new to this may sound a little unreal to you but it really is genuine. It has taken me months of research to develop this understanding. There are several books available on this topic too to guide us but the best way is to read them and develop our ways to materialise what we desire. In case you have any queries I will love to answer them to the best of my abilities. Will surely try to document my experiments with Manifestations in a book as soon as I feel my research and faith has lead me somewhere.

Let me consciously feed my subconscious mind with positive thoughts: My Prayer in 2023

This is my first post in 2023 and this year I believe is going to be the best year of my life so far. I am sure something that magical is going to happen and my heart is already filled with gratitude for the same. 

I am consciously sowing seeds of happiness, peace, good health and positive thoughts in my subconscious and nothing but positivity and gratitude will rule my thoughts this year with no room for negativity and toxicity. 

I am blessed right from my birth till today to be conferred with beautiful people, beautiful life and beautiful experiences and I am sure this will continue to happen forever.

I am replacing the word fear in my life with the word faith that everything is perfectly okay, my intelligent subconscious is healing me and my child and husband every moment because we believe we are perfectly healthy and happy. We are capable and are hard working and focused towards our goals.

Happy Birthday To The Love Of My Life

Wish you a very happy new year & happy birthday my love 

It is such a pleasure to commence every time the new year 

With celebrating you and your infinite selfless love 

And my heart getting filled with gratitude in a million ways dear 

Together we step into 2023

Hand in hand like always 

Leaving behind all that didn’t go our way 

Holding close to our heart every gone by moment precious 

On your birthday I wish you good health and all the happiness 

And success, that you deserve for the amount of hard work 

You put in every day for fulfilling your dreams, our dreams  

Getting better and better in every stream 

It fills my heart with pride 

To see where we have reached in life 

Ours is a friendship of twenty three years

And need I say the journey has been an absolute bliss

But that I am more proud of is

That you are such a worthy human being 

Always caring for every one 

Whether he is known to you or a complete stranger 

It is my privilege to have been the custodian of your journey 

How failures only became strong stepping stones of your rags to riches story 

I know you are still half way done

But I know you deserve to have it all and you will achieve it one day 

On your birthday I wish God confers on you his best blessings

Because conferring to you the best wife isn’t enough clearly😄

You deserve much more darling 

And the universe I am sure shall conspire to grant you all your wishes 

Sorry for my at times being so rowdy

Even when I am moody and angry

I love you to bits and pieces 

And nothing on earth can change my feelings 

Of course we have had our share of highs and lows 

But I believe that adds salt and spice to our life 

We have learned to agree to disagree 

And with you I feel I too am maturing 

Writing to you or about you is never easy

Because we have come so so far 

Literally breathing every single breath in each other’s arms 

We know each other inside out every moment big or small 

On your birthday I have to make a confession to you 

Some times I fail to understand you 

I feel like giving up and cry 

But it is the power of our love that I stand up back and smile 

Because I step into your shoes and realise

Life is too short for regrets and not live it to the fullest 

I am the lucky one to have been blessed with you 

So today I raise a toast to you my gentleman thorough

Wish you a v happy new year and birthday again my soulmate 

I love a zillion times to the moon and back 

May you get all the more joys and keep travelling the world 

And I keep seeing the world through your eyes 

Thank you 2022, you taught me a lot! Welcome 2023, I am all set to embrace you

Lovely morning folks! So yes during planning and shifting to our new abode, writing did take a backseat, though words and ideas never left me alone even for a moment. Thus, at first leisure, here am penning down my heart to my digital diary my blog, my baby, my companion, my safe space whatever I choose to call it, most importantly my breathing corner and to you, my readers, an essential part of my life. 

Let me first begin by sending a prayer of gratitude to the universe for giving me this  December my kind of peaceful and full of simple joys of life kind of celebrations for our wedding anniversary. It began with seeing my baba(Sai) with my husband and feeding the hungry and ended with roses, love songs, and smiles. Nothing else I believe matters as much as true unconditional love and mutual respect. I really love ending my year on this note and also love looking back at how the past year treated you. There is always so much to learn.

2022 otherwise has been a real roller coaster in every sense. I was in Vadodara, Gujarat, one last time, for the first one and a half months, and life there was truly different and unique in several ways in terms of simplicity and culture in comparison to Delhi. I thoroughly relished my stay there and documented several special moments I would remember for the rest of my life. In fact, my book, Letters on Covid for my Future Grandchildren will always be my tribute to the kindness Gujarat has shown to us strangers.

Was back in Delhi in mid-February after celebrating Valentine's week in my own special ways(Life for me is all about living fully and celebrating every moment of life because tomorrow never comes) and then began the gradual opening, post-pandemic era, life. It was quite like being kicked out of inertia(of staying home forever) to get back to a normal routine with offices and schools opening up. But it indeed was desired as the lockdown has reduced social life to mobiles only and professional life to laptops and work from home for most people. The fear of the pandemic slowly weaned.

March kicked off with offline final exams for the kid after two years and ended with an extremely relaxing trip to Goa our usual vacation spot. 

Before that, in mid-March, I had started churning my brain on how to make my 7th consecutive year in AtoZ Blogging Challenge worthwhile. I am glad that my rendezvous with ideas is almost perennial and they unfailingly hit me at 4 a.m., which is solely theirs and my time no matter how adverse the circumstances are. The pristine joy they give me is unparalleled and words fail me to weave those emotions into words.

Back from the Goan vacations, my health took a downturn with a painful endometriosis flare-up lasting for months. The crazy amount of painkillers kept me numb, and cranky and the salts in them made me gain a lot of weight. So I made the pain itself my inspiration for AtoZ and decided to weave it into poems.

April thus began on a poetic note with multiple spells of blood tests and MRIs and expert opinions on several organs removal surgery and indeed I met the best ones in the town including a Padma Shree awardee gynecologist. But something they said stuck with me and that was despite removing multiple organs at such a young age as per them the endometriosis pain may or may not go which was the only stifling symptom that paralyzed my everyday life for over a decade. 

So when there was no guarantee I was not ready to go under the knife one more time without being sure of the results. Then I did what I do always when I don’t have a solution I prayed to my baba, and my Sai and in no time I could search for an Ayurvedic endometriosis specialist in Delhi. Such is He always standing by me in times of need.

Therefore in mid-May started my extensive Ayurvedic treatment with Vasti Panchkarma and here I sit in December 2022 able to manage my symptoms well with the latest reports saying that if the disease has not improved it has neither deteriorated. Of course, I eat fifteen Ayurvedic tablets in a day but this is trusting that they don’t have any side effects and are only reversing the pathology of the disease. Panchakarma is highly effective in removing the toxins in our body and is to be repeated after a fixed number of months depending on patient to patient. I have given my first-hand account of my experience in my blogpost here. 

Thus, thankfully by end of May, I could plan a very special break in Fairmont Palace in Jaipur. I have a thing for Indian culture and love soaking in it every bit. Back home I got super busy with the publishing process of my seventh and my son’s second book and their release in the Blogchatter ebook carnival. This is the most productive time for us during the year and we really love all the lovely reviews that pour in and motivate us and give us a very significant reason to smile.

June was kind in the beginning when we took a jungle safari vacation in Jim Corbett of course followed by our favorite Nainital but by the end, Covid Hit us and how. I could not realize it can leave a lasting impact. I didn’t get major symptoms and was busy caregiving except I could barely eat and kept losing weight but by the tenth day I was in tears. I had acute body aches and fever every evening. I got the tests done and was detected with acute UTI and was put on heavy antibiotics for a month which made my health and fitness go for a complete toss. I was told that this is many times an after-effect of Covid.

In July and August my battle continued as post-UTI, I was advised all wisdom teeth extractions and I had never had a toothache all my life. The dentist told me she has had many post covid cases like this. So again loads of medications and painkillers and I still tried to smile through all of it, trying to fulfill all assignments I had committed to. Both our books also were released on Amazon around this time as I can never really stop working. Being busy I believed cured half the sickness and smiling the rest half. Don’t believe me try it. 

Come September I started to get my groove back. There were several things going back and forth in my mind so I decided to focus. In a month’s time, I will enter my forties and I could always feel the calm in my personality. Undoubtedly, I have slowed down but it was indeed for the good. I now know exactly where to channelize my energies and have learned it the very hard way. I now steer clear of all negative energies in my life and look for only giving and receiving positive vibrations. My journey to embracing peace is all thanks to a lady I call my guru mother whom too I met again after almost a decade in September. She again taught me innumerable things which I practice every day and my heart is filled with gratitude all the more for her.  I will surely write about them at length once I master the techniques so that those of you who wish to practice them can reap the benefits. 

September end was again a weekend getaway time to Neemrana fort as you already know my love everything ancient in India. I also fasted Nirjala for Teej with a lot of difficulties but pulled it through perhaps one last time because my health doesn’t permit it and I can’t torture myself anymore. I will find better ways for the long life of my spouse. 

October is my happy month always perhaps it is my birthday month and the kid in me refuses to grow up. In my 40s I had categorically decided that my three loves were, are, and will always be writing, reading, and traveling apart from the two men in my life. I am no more a party girl and prefer solitude. For my birthday I originally wanted to fly to Udaipur Palaces but that plan did not materialize and last minute I went to the Taj in Agra to relive all my precious childhood memories. My birthday was a serene, peaceful, and happy day for me when I did everything I love. Karvachauth was without hubby who was busy receiving an award in Capetown while I commenced writing my eighth book here along with mommy duties. From this Karvachauth, I customized my Nirjala fasts in accordance with what a fifth-stage endometriosis patient can bear, and am happy God accepted my prayers and gave me many signs that he did. I had always been the rebel but now suddenly I find enough energy to take big decisions which I truly believe in without worrying about the results.

November went basking in festivities and battling the loss of immunity(thus many ups and downs in health) and also personal advancements in terms of a new office and a new abode. Dec 1 we shifted to our new abode and as soon as I was settled, I kept my promise to the old students of my academy and announced the restarting of the same. I was itching to revive it and it gives me immense joy I could do it despite all odds. My students are my lifeline and without them, I felt so incomplete. Though I did teach in an NGO for a few months my real heart lay in grooming 6 to 60-year-olds, in fulfilling their dreams, and I am back to what I love doing the most apart from my three loves mentioned above. I am glad I am back to doing what I love and life has come full circle. I am also grateful to 2022 for making me meet some very pure souls who felt like family as soon as I met them. I am sure these meaningful bonds given to me by my baba shall only grow.

In the last week of 2022, I am so glad I sat down to look back at the gone by year and I can proudly say amidst all the upheaval, it taught me a lot. It uprooted me several times only for me to dig deeper and give firmer roots to my dreams. It tested me more and more to let me know my inner power to endure and to make me capable enough to welcome and embrace 2023 much stronger and more prepared. 

2023 indeed will be a year with specific health and life goals for me and I will achieve them at all costs! I need your blessings and wishes for the same my dears do send out a prayer, a wish for me to the universe. I too wish you love,  luck and light in the coming year, stay blessed. 

If you like what I write, you can grab copies of my six published ebooks here: The Fragrance of True Love, Destiny's Favorite Child, Dare to Defy The Destiny, Empowered Women Empower Women, Soulful Letters On COVID, for my Future Grandchild, I Live to Love You and Soft Strings Of My Heart

This blog post is part of the Let’s Say Hello 2023 Blogging Activity hosted by Swarnali Nath.

Endometriosis has its treatment in Ayurveda

 

Hope you guys had a great Diwali and are back on your health goals. For me as a 5th-stage endometriosis and adenomyosis patient, my fitness and appropriate eating are always a priority. So post-Diwali when with extended family I go easy on my discipline, I gradually switch gears back to my routine as early as I can. 

I had written to you earlier about: 

My Decade-long Endometriosis Battle 

5 Early Signs of Endometriosis 

5 Recommendations for Endometriosis Patients

 

Today I want to write to you about the treatment of endometriosis. I have learned the hard way that endometriosis cannot be treated with Allopathic medicines which though help us manage the symptoms but injections like Lupron have long-term side effects on our body while the underlying disease is not eliminated from the root.

Laparoscopic surgery to remove endometrial tissue growths and Adenomyoma is pain relieving as well but they grow back very soon too. Uterus removal surgery is considered the ultimate treatment but it does not guarantee that you will be pain-free post undergoing the same. This precisely sums up my battle in the first 12 years of battling this disease which crippled my life to a great extent. Not that I did not try alternative medicine like homeopathy but unfortunately they failed to abate my colicky pain almost killing pain. 

Managing the pain symptoms and lifestyle changes were the best bet for keeping endometriosis at bay is what I concluded till May’22 when a very senior gynecologist in Delhi scheduled my surgery for organs(uterus, cervix, and ovaries) removal which she said may or may not relieve the pain.

I was not convinced as to why go under a knife if the problem cannot be eliminated. Thus I researched and dug and dug to find a worthy solution that can be trusted because my Cancer Antigen 125 was extremely high almost 5 times the permissible limit by then and by my Sai’s grace I landed on the SKK panchakarma page. 

I read several testimonials and success stories of Dr. Rani Gupta reversing endometriosis through Ayurvedic medication and Panchakarma. Meeting her was a turning point in my disease history. She told me that over time Ayurveda could reverse the pathology of endometriosis and I could be disease free. Her words were music to my ears and I enrolled with her.

 In June I underwent my first Vasti Panchkarma cycle and have been on Ayurvedic medication since then. My symptoms and quality of life are getting better day after day and now I am mostly able to manage my pain with Ayurvedic painkillers.

Post 5 months of treatment, my disease has almost stabilized and has not increased as per ultrasound and CA125 reports and I expect it to reverse in my second cycle of Vasti Panchkarma scheduled this week. I feel a lot more healthy now and am sure the universe shall surely conspire to make me disease-free for which I shall always be indebted to my doctor for her strong handholding and result-oriented approach.

Endometriosis affects approximately 10% of reproductive-age women and girls globally and the only treatment accepted so far is uterus removal which in no way guarantees the pain shall be gone as endometriosis is a full-body inflammation. 

The purpose of writing this article is to create awareness about Ayurveda as having treatment for endometriosis in most cases. So if you know a near and dear one struggling with the same do guide them to consult a trustworthy Ayurvedic gynac as early as possible to attack the disease early.

 I have shared my first-hand experience here as a patient with a pure aim to let more and more people know about the non-invasive treatment of endometriosis in Ayurveda. 

I shall once again write to you all to update my health status once my treatment is over. Until then I am most positively keeping my fingers crossed with an unparalleled trust in my doctor.

This post is a part of the #CauseaChatter Initiative by Blogchatter.

If you like what I write, you can grab copies of my seven published ebooks here: The Fragrance of True Love, Destiny's Favorite Child, Dare to Defy The Destiny, Empowered Women Empower Women, Soulful Letters On COVID, for my Future Grandchild, I Live to Love You and Soft Strings Of My Heart