Please Find Someone Else : Food For Thought Series Vol-14

If pure love would have a name it wouldn’t be better than Meet-Kavya. They indeed were made for each other and true love reflected not only in their eyes but in their every single expression, every single move towards each other. People swore by their love and by God’s grace their friendship of multiple years did culminate into a perfect wedding. All was merry in their paradise and the soon the birth of their tiny princess Tia further strengthened their priceless bond.

Not very materialistic people, they were happy in their tiny world with Meet doing well in his career and his lady love taking care of their princess and running a small business from home to satiate her creative instincts.

Not only everyone around but she herself has forgotten what an ambitious girl she once was. With threads of love, sincerity and utmost dedication she has weaved her little nest, she had presumed to be unbreakable and the happiness of the two lives of her life were what made her happy too. She never considered giving up a flourishing career at its peak a sacrifice...after all, their and eventually her happiness is all she wanted. Meet loved her immensely and their relationship saw many little ups and downs but has only grown stronger and more mature with each passing day. The way they trusted each other through thick and thin was an example and that’s where lied their strength.

Another aspect of both of their personalities was the goodness(a trait that has initially bound them together) of their hearts, helping the ones in need was their innate nature and their urge to help knew no limits. I know how good or bad this trait was but their was someone in Meet’s office who apparently needed him or for that matter anyone...she was a colleague, a divorcee and a single mom to a tiny tot. Meet always helped her to the best of his abilities as was his nature probably as he would have helped any other colleague in need. 

Then what really went wrong in Meet-Kavya’s paradise? The fact that the other person needed an emotional anchor if not a financial or a physical one for her life made her assume that because someone else left her for somebody else, she has all rights to steal Meet from Kavya. She deliberately invented ways to spend more and more time with Meet veiling all her moves under the name of friendship. Kavya saw this all but her trust on Meet was infallible. 

All her advances proved that she craved for the same love for herself and her child as Meet showered on his family. It breaks my heart to own that probably was right in aspiring for some love for herself( the complexity of human emotions is too deep to fathom)...the fact that she desired it at the cost of ruining a wonderfully happy family made her really bad.

Kavya is my bestie so my heart undoubtedly goes out to her but if you ask me, it undoubtedly has to be Meet who must resist all friendly advances and gestures from this person for undoubtedly it might be Meet’s helping hand or act of kindness is what is misread as something else (I so much wish she spares my Kavya and finds some other single man). Spending so much time together in the name of the other person being needy may be breaking some real loved one’s heart back home, who still places all her trust in you and so is quiet despite of friends and neighbours pointing it out  to her in random discussions. 

I don’t know if Meet is attracted towards her or but if maintaining distance from such a colleague is essential for someone back home to whom and to only whom you belong to and who deserves you every which way, Meet must take such a step. Not only for her but for the little one who calls her dad.No one has a slightest idea how this would not only ruin his present but to a greater extent his future with his spouse too for he would loose the ability to trust.

What would you have done in such a situation??

Have you read our earlier True Tales in the #FoodforThought series? Find them below.

  1.When the negative energy around her breaks her down

2.You Don't Love Me Mom

3.Confessions of an Unapologetic Mom

4.Indian Alice in Wonderland

 5.Dear Aaji, I miss you and your Golden Talisman

6.Some Wounds Never Heal

7.The Incomplete Feeling that lingers on...
8.Is it ok to withdraw terming her a socially awkward child?

9. Isn't it good to Share, Mom!

10.I am not an emotionless Hard Rock
11. When Her Little Sunshine Asked Her To Get Back To Her Dreams But The World Was Not Ready To Accept Her

12.The Little Boy At The Signal Who Still Wakes Me Up In The middle Of Night

13. Was she in love with two different men?

Is it ok to withdraw terming her a socially awkward child? (Food For Thought Series Vol-8)

Aantrika is a single child born to a teacher mom and a businessman dad after 7 years of their marriage, in a nuclear family. An adorable princess, she was the apple of her parents' eyes. She was not naughty and was always quiet , playing with her toys alone in her room was what pleased her the most.

As time elapsed, she grew up into an exceptionally brilliant and talented child. Her medals kept mounting and she kept growing in her own world. Her mom and dad as they came back from work, always found her a very good and obedient child and so did her teachers who were full of praise for her.

Then, what was wrong? This pretty little girl never opened her heart to anyone. She barely spoke a few words in the whole day and was always surrounded by books, she so loved to read. She never liked going to birthday parties and felt awkward in social gatherings. She tried her best to avoid people and smile never fully touched her lips. The world soon termed her a recluse and she lived with the tag. Destiny further struck, when God took away her mom from her when was in tenth grade.

As she grew up a little more, this pretty damsel became my room mate in our hostel. The sadness in her eyes bothered me and those silent eyes pricked my heart. Many a times I struck a conversation but could get to know very little. She was either lost in her books or was listening to Jagjit Singh Ghazals. I really wanted to know why she never smiled, is their nothing which can ever make her happy. I could just understand one thing that there was an unknown fear that prevented her from enjoying life to its full. I was opposite, an extrovert full of life and wish I could have rubbed it on her. Our differences made us stick together for many years then. Later we got jobs in different companies in different cities. While  so many eligible bachelors were waiting for her, she silently tied knot to a very simple and timid human being of a very different caste and left India. She again chose a hidden life at a place where no one would know her.

She wrote to me recently and opened her heart out. I could not hold my tears as I could not believe all that she has faced throughout her childhood and now that she was a mother of a daughter herself , she doesn't want her to silently face the worst like her. The letters ink has swollen with her eyes where she wrote how for years her parents most trusted domestic aid Maharaj has Molested and sexually abused her. It was not that she never wanted to voice this to her Parents, she did try but her plea was withdrawn considering she was a very small child and was misreading the gesture which made her embrace perennial silence. But in turn this made a fear from everyone other than her mom and dad sit in her heart forever. It took her decades to overcome this fear or is it even gone today? Will such a child ever be able to trust anyone in her lifetime.

If everyone would not have withdrawn that time, terming her a Socially Awkward Child and even one of them would have tried to find the real cause behind it, we could have saved this girl from leading a painful , full of fright, tormenting life....I am glad she has summoned the courage to speak it out today so that her daughter and many more daughters of the world don't get stifled by the inhuman tendencies of some psychopaths who don't even spare children of their vicious tendencies. It's high time we keep a strict eye on any behaviour deflections of our kids and also on the people that surround them.

      Copyright ©2016 Roma Gupta Sinha 

Have you Read our earlier True Tales in the #FoodforThought series:

       1.When the negative energy around her breaks her down,

        what course must Radhika Take?

2.You Don't Love Me Mom

3.Confessions of an Unapologetic Mom

4.Indian Alice in Wonderland

 5.Dear Aaji, I miss you and your Golden Talisman

6.Some Wounds Never Heal

7.The Incomplete Feeling that lingers on... 

  

What A Day It Was : A Decade Later I Relive It For You

Some Days are Real Pearls

Which when woven into a garland

Adorn life and make it beautiful

Our wedding was truly a dream come true and so was our wedding day. It has taken some real hard-work to convince our families and get their nod for us to tie the knot with everyone's blessings. And I am so glad our love did win and after a lot of discussions and rescheduling, our wedding date was finally locked. The venue for the same was fixed at bride groom's place as per the need of the hour and almost everyone was invited on either side. This being an extreme inter caste wedding, my mom has been meticulous in noting down all their customs and the essentials for them. On the other hand, I and S have been silently praying that all goes well. 

Flashback:  5 December 2005
The day began on a sweet note when my granny woke me up for the customary 4a.m. rose petals bath. I almost froze in the December chill but all for her love I did managed to smile throughout. Or was it the overwhelming feeling of eventually getting united with your love that made the sail through the infinite customs that day seem like a cakewalk.

It was a 24 hour wedding with Engagement, Pheras and the Reception all planned in the same day. This being the first wedding from our side and the last from theirs,the excitement was at peak. Almost every relative and friend on the guest list has made it and their presence and smiles were priceless for us. There was no differentiation between the hosts and guests and everyone was ready to contribute their bit on what was going to be a perfect medley, albeit a little confusing, of Kaistha and Baniya Ceremonies, in the pious city of Allahabad.

After finishing the early morn ceremonies at the guest house, I was clad in a blue Saree sent by the groom's side and escorted to the banquet. A mere glance at the banquet which was decorated in white and red flowers was so appealing and soothing. I ran my eyes through how huge and mesmerizing it was..I was living my dream. My prince charming would come in a while and complete our fairy tale and yes I could see him waiting on the stage.

 The next ritual that morn was God Bharai and Ring Ceremony. As I moved slowly on the red flower-laden aisle towards him, my heart started beating faster. It's a very special feeling words fail me to describe. We have known each other for umpteen years, but today when he looked into my eyes, I blushed. He kept smiling while talking to his cousins and friends who surrounded us. I am sure they were cracking jokes and discussing our love story as I could see them burst into laughter but I heard nothing, my heart was humming its own tunes and dancing in ecstasy. I was silent and if anything, they were my tinkling eyes that gave away all the secrets.

In a while, he has held my hand in his to skid the ring into my finger. The tenderness with which he held my hand and the earnest and candid gesture of very gently moving the ring inside touched me, for this warmth and care was the quality which I loved the most in him. Someone from the crowd shouted loud that now their boy was no more theirs and all of us grinned aloud crazily on many jokes which followed until our stomachs ached.

The day advanced slowly, we didn't speak much to each other and only exchanged some love tit-bits on our BBMs occasionally between so many outfit changes, photo shoots and customs from either side. I understood a few and did not many others but was elated, super-elated.

It was now time for the Pheras which would unite us and our souls, at least for 7 births. The Phera Pandal was made of glass and was placed amidst huge lawns adorned with flowers of myriad shades. Now, I was dressed in a made to order half red half yellow Saree bearing in mind the colors required from either side for this ceremony.

 Words again fail me to describe my gratitude to my mom for doing all the homework so impeccably for every single custom so that no religious sentiments are hurt. The priest was a great learned intellectual who translated the sanskrit shlokas of Pheras in English  for me. He was a guy who has also conducted the wedding ceremony of S' s Parents and thus his connection to our family was deep as was evident from his love for us which oozed out of his eyes. 

He blessed us and concluded our wedding after kanyadaan during which I peeped into my dad's moist eyes. Though they were numb they also seemed confident that he was handing over his princess in the right hands. It was heartening that he trusted my choice but all said and done leaving mom and dad was a very heavy feeling. S sensed my anxiety and like a perfect partner tried to make the moment lighter. My little brother whom I didn't realize when had grown so sensible, realizing the gravity of the moment, picked me up in his arms and took me to groom's side for the next following ceremonies.

The party was in full swing. Yummy food was laid in the lawns and the Dance Floor was burning hot. While I walked down to get ready for the Wedding Reception, I could see everyone making merry. It was a pleasure seeing everyone happy on the happiest day of our life. My cousin helped me getting ready in the gorgeous orange lehenga(Indian Bridal Dress) my mum chose for me and then went to get ready herself.

 It was about 10:45 in the night when S texted me that he is waiting for me for a long time to which I replied in innocence that I have been ready for a while too but there is no one around me to fetch me to him. In just a couple of minutes I saw him bending in front of me as he whispered in my ears - "You are now officially mine! You need no one else" and then with his known gentleness he held my hand and walked me to the Reception stage. 

On stage, I met S' s dad,  a wonderful  human being at heart for whom we had squeezed all the events in a single day and preponed our wedding by more than 2 months as he was at the last stage of lung cancer. His last wish was fulfilled and we were glad we could fulfill it beautifully as he miraculously lived for many more days.

Next couple of hours went in meeting and greeting guests and full on DJ Masti along with the mandatory solo performance by the Bride. 

I performed on Kajrare Kajrare - Aishwarya Rai's most popular number of that time though it wasn't easy to do so in a heavy lehenga and heels. Nevertheless, I went with the flow of the moment and danced my heart out in which S joined soon.

 Post an exorbitant dinner, came the Vidai which was the only heart- breaking event of the day though my parents chose not to shed a single tear and bid me good times ahead.No doubt they are the pillars of all my strength. My little brother concluded the last ceremony by pushing our car out of the gate. In a few minutes, we were home, my new and forever to be home.

Everyone welcomed us with a lot of love and soon we were taken to our room. It was 3 a.m. by then...and we have to get up at 6 for the Pooja. So did we sleep for the next 3 hours? Obviously not...one and a half hour he spent in removing the not less than hundred Jooda (Hindi Word for a Hair-bun) pins in my hair and the rest one and half hour went in laughing at our bed with squeaked aloud at every single movement of ours.

Truly 'What a day it was'. It gifted me forever togetherness with the love of my life. It's been more than ten years since then but the memories of the precious and priceless moments of that day are forever imprinted on my heart and it was indeed a pleasure re-living them day here. Trust you enjoyed the sail-through as much as I did.

And yes, I would like to conclude this post with us of today who still bask in the glory of that awesome day which united us forever :)

© [Roma Gupta Sinha][Straight From The Heart][2016]Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material or pictures without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited.

On My Birthday Today, Raising a Toast to Our Priceless Friendship with 'Yaaron Ki Baraat'

File Photo with my Bestie of Decades

Friends are the best things that came happen to you in a lifetime and I am that lucky one who by God's grace have them in abundance. My friends truly are my heart. What better proof can I furnish, I am married to my chaddy-buddy of 25 years.

Owing to the great friendship of our dads, I have been almost born and brought up with him, just that he entered the world ten months before me. From walking hand in hand to our kindergarten carefully through the corner of the roads, to facing adolescent dilemmas to admitting our first crushes to each other we have shared it all. From as long back as I remember our moms always brought the same cloth to stitch my frock and his shirt , our first cycles were similar and our dads even celebrated our birthdays together to cut costs or in all probability to raise a toast to their friendship which we only understand now.

Incidentally today is my birthday too and I am feeling so blessed to write this treatise, this ode on friendship for my best friend of life but does that mean he'll me my goody goody bestie who'll walk back from work with a cake and some red roses.. You're mistaken guys, he loves playing pranks on me and had played the worst of them mostly on my birthdays. And when I had burst into cries through his perennial teasing, he's the one who has persuaded me for hours and what followed were wonderful priceless moments with a wonderful gift, cakes and chcocolates. So I actually fear what's in store for me today! Nevertheless I absolutely love his mischief and the fact that it's not a man and a wife but two best buddies who reside in my home sweet home.

Its Funny to Marry A Man who knows all your Secrets

I am no less. While he has never leaked any of my secrets and buried them forever in his heart, I had always ditched him on this front. Whether it was a news of his new crush which changed quite frequently or the fact that he has a loan of Rs: 14 on the local grocers, I will always give it away smilingly only to be beaten up by him later. He insisted most of the amount of loan was for the chocolates he bought for me why the hell will I agree after eating them up. But all this was only between us, if a third friend said something about him, I would not listen a word and will fight him out with all my might.

With the advent of adolescence, as I was gradually blooming from a bud to a flower, I started despising wearing the same cloth dress as his shirt and got busy with the new friends I made but somehow we always managed to make time for each other. There is something so special about friends, you will always hang around each other exactly at the moment the other one needs you the most without at all showing it off.

Ours was a very adorable kind of friendship where he always made fun of me and kept pulling my leg and I always tried to ignore him. We were now not the buddies who rode our bicycle to school together but if my cycle got punctured on the way, he was the one I looked for and I don't know how he always emerged at that moment to help me and the same holds good till today. He was and is always my Mr. Dependable and for more than 3 decades now we have stood by each other in thick and thin.

But at that tender age we were undoubtedly not that sensible enough to understand at that time that ours was a priceless unique bond of a lifetime God has created himself through his sacred hands. Time just flew past and in all our naughtiness we never realised we have grown up and even worse we don't know till today when we had fallen in love. Everyone around us could sense it but not we. Our friendship ran like blood into our veins by this time for us to even realise something else.

It's when we turned 22 and his dad was on death bed on account of some medical emergency and has expressed his last desire to see both of us married, did we have our first ever thought to it.

The Most Hilarious Wedding of Two Chaddi Buddies

And I am so glad we did for we soon realised we were meant to me together forever. Our love did become the superset of our deep rooted friendship but the foundation still is of the two tiny chaddy buddies walking hand in hand this time on the crossroads of life. Our extreme inter-caste marriage was an extremely hilarious event too with laughter and happiness prevailed all around.

Today our little boy is seven years old and its a pleasure to have a third best buddy in our gang at home and we three enjoy the same camaraderie, the same Love and Mastii, insane naughtiness as we two did when we were tiny.

The Third Chaddy Buddy Joins Mom-Dad's Gang

I value my friendship above all humanity and our sweet memories weaved in the beautiful journey of life form our strong backbone and support system in the ups and downs of life. Thus, the fact that I will we able to enjoy more such adorable Celebrity friendships for the first time on Indian Television on

Zee TV's new show, Vivo Smartphone presents Yaaron Ki Baraat 

co-powered by Amazon.in and Brooke Bond Red Label, where the stalwarts of industry share lovely memories and anecdotes from their lives, makes me so excited and I really look forward to it..Actually watching its awesome commercial, made me raise a toast to my best buddy, through this post and thus I feel so connected to it even before it's telecasts begin. This rocking show will put celebrity friendship to tests through a series of fun challenges and tasks. Do Tune in at 8 p.m. on Zee TV for the same on 8th October and experience 'The Friendship Phenomenon' and deep rooted secrets of nation's heartthrobs, loaded with tonnes of fun and Mastii.

A Glimpse of zee TVs New Entertainment Show- Yaaron Ki Baraat

Enjoy And Have Fun!