Life has been a roller coaster for the past few years and I have not been able to catch up with it but I am still trying to show up every day. I put up a brave front almost always and face life head-on as it comes each day. Some days I lose it, even shed tears sometimes but I let it pass in the hope of a better tomorrow because no matter how rosy a picture we paint, this is how life is. In fact, the challenges it poses for us make it worth living. If everything would have happened according to what we desired we may now be able to enjoy them in a real sense. So there is a simple mantra I have learned to live by
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Life is beautiful, God is kind, take one day at a time
The difficulties of today may soon melt away and the darkness shall soon give way to sunshine
because nothing else is working for me. From being trained in a Japanese organization where we devoted 70% of our time to planning, I have taken a 360-degree turn to only dwell at the moment.
You can read my earlier posts in this series here:
2. 6 Ways to Use Your Internal Strength to Overcome Non-conducive External Factors
3. The Power of Suggestions to help the ones you love, tap the power of their subconscious
4. You Become What Your Mind Thinks Of You
I had a beautiful settled life in Pune surrounded by my students, and my academy, which gave my life meaning. After giving up my dream job in Ikea of Sweden, this is the best thing that has happened to me. I love being a positive change in people’s life and that is what I aim to do with my writings and in my Endometriosis Support Group or whichever way I can. (This is why I am hosting an exclusive blog hop with my friend Rakhi Jayashankar in October which is an emotional wellness month and how I feel emotional wellness and intelligence are most neglected in India).
Life was modest in Pune for a decade and being a girl who thrives on little joys of life, I liked my low-profile life and money never meant anything more than the necessity to survive. In July 2019 I had my major endometriosis surgery and in September 2019 I shifted with my bag and baggage to Delhi. With my students many of whom became my friends for life, I left my life, my heart, and my new home back and was welcomed to the extravagant Delhi with open arms but I could never really fit in and stay mostly confined indoors soaking in my own company. I often ran to spend months in Vadodara Gujarat and Goa whenever I got a chance perhaps because at heart I am a nomad who never really settles at a place.
Though I am proud that in the past year, I have genuinely evolved a lot mentally and in a safe space after a long, yes life is still a battle but the mind manages it mostly. My mind encourages me to go on self-dates where I choose to go to a beautiful cafe or garden and spend time with myself penning beautiful thoughts for my articles or books or penning fiction sometimes sipping my favorite coffee or a Belgian chocolate shake. I don’t plan or strategize anymore, I just dwell in that moment, those 30 minutes to 1 hour that I steal for myself, and then get back to my routine responsibilities.
Of course, I have some friends in Delhi but the way I have started to enjoy my own company is therapeutic, I am genuinely now my own best friend. I love how whenever I have peaceful early mornings to myself, I chant in silence with Alexa or do Yoga. Long nature walks in the jungle behind my home alone listening to old Hindi songs like that in the movie ‘Guide’ or black and white Hindi songs instantly lift me up and make me smile. This is how I secure my mental health during the endo flare-ups I undergo every month so often in the last fifteen years of my battle with endometriosis.
Being my own best friend has healed me and empowered me and this friendship is forever because it has become my guiding light, particularly as I advent in my forties. My writings are not only the softest most earnest pieces of my heart but also they are my channel to share with the world all that I wish it to know and learn from or gain from. This anecdote too was meant to reach all of you. Thank you for taking out time to read me.
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