Watch Out For That Jealous Black-hearted Near and Dear One...

The bitter truth of life is the more good you do to people, more are the chances of you being used and unfortunately many a times you will be oblivious of the fact that you are being used because the perpetrator will be a near and dear one(this phrase is actually a misnomer) whom you would trust blindly. Painfully you will come to know about it after you have been duped and trapped and left gasping for breath in a tight situation. These people may often appear as submissive and weak and you won't have a slightest inkling of the kind of plan they will be brewing in their hearts. I have even gone to the extent of having pity on one such person and out of pity helping him/her but all he/she did was passing her monkey on my back. It isn't that you almost always aren't wise but you are humane that they silently backstab you and your goodness fails you again to give it a fight. 

There's another set of these near and dear ones who ironically stay far and are quite well to do but are so jealous or it's probably their inherent black heart that they will keep making vehement attempts to ruin your happiness and success in whichever way they can and never leave a single stone unturned to cause you harm. But again if you are good, you will bear it hoping that this will make them improve some day and you owe them this support in good blood. Also, most often than not you won't be able to judge their moves as you love them dearly. But the fact is despite of sometimes making crazy money their lives perhaps lack the sparks and they just can't bear any one else having what they don't. They will call at hours when they know will be your personal moments and will try and seek more information with an intention to malice your plans with well thought of logics. There are as many men doing this as women so I can't say if the behaviour is gender-skewed.

The two above categories are often hidden players and leave you aghast with their betrayal and I am ashamed to admit that I have met and have been deceived by both of the above kinds and the worst part is people like me always fall in the trap. That's why I say emotional fools are forever meant to be fooled.

So does that mean we should stop being good or stop posting happy pictures on social media to prevent these people from getting jealous. So precisely change ourselves for them but why? We sure can't do anything to change them either. Planning a tit for that is out of thought for again your goodness stands in the path. Maintaining distance is also not possible as they often are even your blood ties. For example I know this one person who is being used to the last drop of his blood but he says he does it all in the name of duties. So all that I could think of is watch out for that one jealous black hearted near and dear one. Try not to fall in his eye for good reasons and bring in balance in all your acts. If you can think of a better way to deal with these paranoids, please do share.

Can A Clumsy Homemaker be a Perfect Wife??

What happens when the man faces that the woman he fell irreversibly in love with for her academic and professional brilliance and which made her stand out of the rest, is quite a 180 degrees turn when it comes to home-making.

Last night the kitchen slab and sink crashed in front of my eyes and the poor husband was only worried if I was fine before engaging a guy to mend it today. 

Similarly a couple of months ago I burnt my face and right shoulder and arm by a exploding pressure cooker, by God's grace my life was spared but S is still calling up everyday after my cooking time to check if I am fine. I wonder why I am so clumsy in kitchen and what my man thinks about this(Phew!), he never says a word though and smiles. Ours is such a beautiful and meaningful relationship andthen there are these harrowing acts of mine.

I remember when we were newly weds how he used to cook for both of us and I did what I was rather am best at - loving him in all my special and unique ways. That time both of us went to work and cooking together was a romance time late evenings in our kitchen. He was(is) such a exceptional cook and I always helped him and hanged around his neck. No words were ever needed to make it evident that I had zero interest in cooking. I knew I am a disaster at it and thus was reluctant to even give it a try.

But as our little sonny grew up a little and I announced a sabbatical, I decided to cook myself for the two precious men in my life and you see the struggle continues to present day. I am such a misfit in the role no matter how hard I try, I have no aptitude for culinary skills and in general am a clumsy homemaker but I try it each day...am not the one who gives up so easily.

On the contrary,  if it's a matter of my kid's education and his skills or giving hubby a perfect advice in a stuck situation in his high profile corporate job, I nail them to perfection. Similarly, if it is a work outside the house everyone including my precious half always trusts me the most for they know no one would do it like I do. Neighbours and relatives flock me each day for their decisions related to their kids' future or any other vital one and I am glad they rely on me so much. But when it comes to kitchen and food, I become sheepishly absent-minded.

There are moments when I feel so sorry for not being able to find the stomach way to my man's heart as the old saying has it but the next moment I realize I already live in his heart. We are perfect partners, we love each other a lot and live life king size in each other's arms accepting each other the way we are. I somehow try to believe he doesn't find my clumsiness in household cores weird as he still cooks for me on the weekends and I still do what I am best at - love him like no one else. I take care of his tiniest need even before he can utter a word about it. I value and respect him as a person and stand like a wall behind all his decisions.

I can proudly say we have had some really awesome years of marriage so far barring my kitchen escapades and look forward to many more. But does being a clumsy homemaker prevents me from being a perfect wife??? What is your take on it, as a man or a woman?