There are some days when u tend to sink...especially when forced circumstances for a long period steal your rhythm and peace of mind. Externally you maintain your composure and project a normal you but your soul craves for life. It's easy to share and seek solace but it's not always possible to speak your heart out
without being judged. Thus most often than out you choose silence and convince yourself that it's in the best of every dear and near one for whom you are the centre of responsibility.
And this hits the worst an extrovert like me who otherwise will babble his/her heart out but embraces a deep silence when experiencing the lowest point of the sinusoidal curve of life. Consequentially I weave a deep web of solitude around me which hardly anyone can break except for one man who hears all that I haven't spoken...who reads my eyes with his heart...who can read my fingers just by a mere touch.
He is a silent man who expresses in meagre words or rather has he ever expressed in words. Very neutral, very balanced, for all my successes he has been there, always, in the last lane of the crowd after training me hard for the same, he chose oblivion. My heart has cried and even been sarcastic why not like other hubbies he has come running and lifted me in his arms. But that's not he. He is who has silently through his precious unconditional love given me wings to fly but never made a noise about it. He is the eureka in my life from whom I derive all my power without realising. Strange but I wonder if he ever reads what I write though he's the force behind but if a failure hits he lifts my despair in his arms and throws it out of my heart, without showing it a pence. Such is my love..
And yes when the worst hits, without a single spoken word, he knows it all and knows how to caress my soul. With utmost love he holds my hand and takes me for a big surprise sensing exactly what I need. There he heals me with therapeutic touch and the warmth of his love. Again with no words spoken, we spend hours, sitting by the still waters and lush green mountains till all the agony and sorrows are washed off.
I beam back in energy, smilingly, my and pick up life once again. This time with a heart filled with gratitude to Lord for giving me him who is the reason of my very existence. My heart no more craves for his words or displays of affection as I am now so much in love with his divine silence.